The Workout Witch: Liz Tenuto on Trauma, Somatics, and When the Body Speaks (Part 1)

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[00:00:27] This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or mental health advice. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone, or anything. I'm Sarah Edmondson.

[00:00:56] And I'm Anthony Nippy Ames. And this is A Little Bit Culty. We woke up from a cult. And that journey was captured in The Vow on HBO and in my memoir, Scarred. Now in this podcast, we break down the shame and secrets that make these experiences so destructive with honest conversations on how seemingly benign groups can cross into the cultiverse and how to spot and recover from trouble if it happens to you. Each week, we bring in experts, survivors, and whistleblowers to explore red flags, resilience, and even share a few laughs because sometimes you gotta laugh.

[00:01:24] Subscribe to our Patreon for early and ad-free listening, some live Q&A and exclusive content at patreon.com slash a little bit culty. Welcome to season eight of A Little Bit Culty. Seeking down, taking down to the ocean. Hey everyone, welcome back to A Little Bit Culty.

[00:01:49] Today's guest is here to challenge a belief that so many of us carry, that if we're struggling, something must be wrong with us. Liz Tenuto, also known as The Workout Witch on social media, is a leading expert in somatic healing, helping hundreds of thousands of people understand what their bodies have been trying to say all along. With over 230,000 students and millions following her work online, Liz is changing how we think about stress, trauma, and healing, shifting the conversation from fixing ourselves to actually listening to our nervous systems.

[00:02:18] Her new book, When the Body Speaks, is a guide for anyone who's ever felt stuck in patterns they can't think their way out of. Drawing from her own experience with trauma, Liz is a survivor of a cult of one and will share her story with us. Liz brings both depth and clarity to this conversation as we explore why trauma isn't just something we remember. It's something the body carries. I personally found this episode unbelievably helpful, and I can't wait to share this episode with you.

[00:02:45] From panic and shutdown to chronic tension and burnout, we're unpacking what's really happening beneath the surface and how to begin working with your body instead of against it. Not only did we love the book, we loved this chat so much, but trigger alert, we do talk about some upsetting issues and we ask you to listen with care. Here is part one with Liz Tenuto. The Workout Witch.

[00:03:22] Liz, welcome to A Little Bit Culty. Thank you so much for having me. We are so excited. This is like, I know we've never met before, but this is one of the bonuses about our podcast is we get to have like one-on-one chats with people that we really can learn so much from. And it feels like, wow, we have like a bonus coaching therapy session with an expert. Yeah. Yes. Yes. I'm excited. We are too. And this is like, you know, you've got a huge following.

[00:03:51] You've really like tapped to obviously a much needed market. TikTok. TikTok has, you know, catapulted you. Is this accurate? TikTok and Instagram or mostly TikTok? TikTok is my foundation. It's where I built my business. And then I started cross-posting to Instagram. Oh my goodness. We're the opposite. In fact, TikTok, when it came out, I was like, I'm never going to learn that. It's way too complicated. And looking at your success, I'm like, I guess maybe I should. Did you learn TikTok or did you have someone come on in?

[00:04:20] I actually taught myself TikTok when I was like deeply depressed and I couldn't get out of bed after leaving my abusive marriage. I was like, let me just download this fun app and watch people dance. And that's what I thought I was doing. And then I was like, so sad. And I was like, maybe I should try to post one of my exercises per day on this platform. I have zero followers. No one can see what I'm doing.

[00:04:47] And I was too embarrassed to post on Instagram to like my 1700, you know, past colleagues and friends and stuff. So I was really sad. Yeah, I was like, I like was really sad. I was like emaciated, you know, just so sad. And I was like, let me just see if I can create this visual journal for myself. And this is a way to hold myself accountable to doing my own exercises.

[00:05:13] And then I gained like 10,000 followers in three weeks, which was shocking for me. I thought it would be super niche. And I was just documenting my own journey and it blew up. Amazing. So that's sort of how social media can be so incredibly useful and reach people that, you know, you didn't even know needed to be reached. Let's give our listeners a little context as to why you're an expert and why you're on this podcast.

[00:05:42] And just so you know, you know, we get solicited by publishers and PR people all the time. And often I'm like, that sounds really interesting, but I don't really see the cult angle. And that was my first thought too. And then when I looked into a little bit of your story, I was like, oh no, this is perfect for our podcast. Because A, you have the lived experience and B, you found a route out. And our emphasis is so much on healing. And we're always looking for different tools to give our audience.

[00:06:08] So I'm so excited that you're here because I feel like this is an area that we haven't explored yet fully. I mean, we've talked about trauma and we've talked about PTSD and see PTSD, but we haven't really talked about somatics specifically. I'm so excited to give you a platform on our platform and to introduce our audience to what you do. So tell us about how you got here. I was in a abusive marriage. I believe that my ex-husband was a narcissist.

[00:06:36] And I think a lot of cult leaders are narcissists. I'm not diagnosing them. It's just kind of a pattern of behavior. Yeah, it's a feature. It's kind of a pattern of behavior that when I watch cult documentaries or I hear stories about cult survivors, I'm like, wow, they experienced coercive control and like incremental insidious escalating abuse, similar to how I experienced in my marriage. So I got married.

[00:07:06] I got like love bombed, which is where, you know, at the beginning of the relationship, they treat you super well. They seem like your dream partner. And we moved to marriage really quickly. We were only dating for like a little over a year before we got married. But I was so excited. I was like, this is my dream person. Everything was great. And then right after we got married, like a switch changed. It was like a Jekyll and Hyde situation.

[00:07:35] And financial abuse started, emotional abuse started. And then it just like slowly escalated and got worse. There was isolation, you know, stripping you down in terms of like your identity, like losing your identity. And those things I think are really similar to what I've heard cult survivors experience as well. Do you feel like you were targeted? I feel slightly like I was targeted.

[00:08:03] I was like really open and empathetic and generous and kind, but also in a way kind of naive. Like I didn't realize that people could be that abusive, you know, like I didn't understand that. And it was something that like I couldn't make sense of. And even it took me a long time, even after getting out of the marriage to be like,

[00:08:31] how could someone like pretend to love you and abuse you at the same time? And like live with you and like be doing this as like their full-time job. Well, the precursor to their abuse is usually the love bombing. So that's when the abuse starts. And the reason I ask that is, you know, we do a lot of interviews for our book. And one of the things that I really try to emphasize is these people are strategic and know exactly what they're doing.

[00:09:00] And that is the hardest thing for people to get their heads around when it's over. It's like, oh my God, this person did this from the beginning. It was strategic. And it's a very hard thing for, as you say, someone like you who's empathetic to project that kind of malevolence into someone who's behaving in a very exemplary fashion to set it up. That is the hardest reconciliation I find for most people. Just the fact that they do it and the fact that those people exist and they're strategic in how they target you and all those things is a very hard thing to get.

[00:09:30] It's a hard pill to swallow. That's a dark, dark side of humanity that these people are out there and oftentimes thriving. Yeah. And it's really scary. What does the love bombing look like in a cult situation? Well, it's similar in that when you meet somebody who's trying to recruit you or bring you in, you feel connected. You feel like you've, I mean, you feel good. You feel warm and fuzzy. I mean, for me, and by the way, I'm going to send you a copy of our next book,

[00:09:56] which has a whole chapter on love bombing and how I got love bombed and how Nippy got love bombed was different for me. I didn't really, well, go ahead. Yeah. But we, the book is broken down to here's the pattern. Here's how it happened to me. Here's how it happened to Nippy and here's what happened to a couple of guests. So our readers get a really clear sort of template of how different it all looks, but it's also the same. But usually it's just like a lot of affection. You know, we, I felt like I found my tribe.

[00:10:23] I felt really excited and it was very fast, very quick. Like this is my new life purpose. I would also add like with the body of work that we have and not to paint too broad a strokes and get it gender specific, but it's normally men who target the empathy of women. Right. And so like most women that at least that I've come across don't have this dark triad that

[00:10:52] you hear about right now. It's mostly a male feature and I'm not picking on men per se. I just think that's, there's more, or maybe more men are successful at it and more women are susceptible because they have more empathy and they target the empathy of women. And if you're empathetic, you don't really have that dark side. So the elements of surprise is always going to be there. And they know that they know that they could even do a bad behavior and you would never project bad intent into them.

[00:11:21] So they can actually make a lot of mistakes until you catch on to like, wait a minute, this guy's a dick. Like, this is what he does. This is what he does. And like, you know, there's a body of work that to suggest that, hey, maybe this guy, but he has a lot of leeway with empathetic women. I think that's kind of my theory and what I put together over. And we, as women go, oh, we had a bad childhood. Yeah, totally. You justify it because you have to also have to justify your decision. Exactly. And they know that, right? They go, what are you going to do?

[00:11:50] Leave now? Like, it's kind of like that whole, like, they've got you trapped and dependent. So it's like, that's the first setup of abuse because now you're in and you have to do a lot of things to inconvenience your lifestyle to get out of it. Yeah. And you talked about that in your book, how you were trapped, specifically in COVID, which made it very difficult to leave. Yeah. Physically trapped. Yeah. Like, where are you going to go? You can't even go to the grocery store. Yeah.

[00:12:18] So during that time, and now that you know what you know, and I think you'll maybe get some even more nuggets if you have the time to read our book. But looking back, like, what were some of the initial red flags that maybe you missed because you didn't have the knowledge you have now? Before we hear from our sponsors, just a quick reminder. Our book, A Little Bit Culty, Navigating Cults, Control and Coercion is officially out and available on Amazon. Signed pre-orders have closed, but you can still get your copy today.

[00:12:46] This book is the culmination of five years of conversations, interviews, and research. Everything we've learned about how people get pulled into high control groups and how to avoid, escape, or heal from them. If you've been listening to the podcast and want a deeper go-to resource, this is it. Available now on Amazon in print and as an e-book for Kindle. And yes, the audiobook is coming soon, narrated by us. Just search A Little Bit Culty and grab your copy. Do it. Thanks, everybody.

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[00:18:08] Thank you to our sponsors and thank you for listening. Now let's resume our culty combo. There were random charges on my credit card sometimes when we were dating that I was just like, and I had never had financial issues before dating him. I didn't make a ton of money before dating him, but I had always, you know, been able to pay my bills and I wasn't in a lot of debt or anything like that. But I was like, what is this thousand dollar charge? You know, like, did I do this?

[00:18:38] And I was like, maybe I did do this and I don't remember. I think I was kind of trying to be like, it must be my memory because I'm also a trauma survivor from childhood and have CPTSD and knew that at the time. So I was like doubting myself instead of doubting him because he would have had to like go into my drawer and like open this little cubby where I kept my credit card when I wasn't home and then, you know, make the charge.

[00:19:06] So there was also another thing that is hard for me to share. But right when he moved in, all of the data got deleted from my computer and from my external hard drive and I went to the Mac store and they were like, there's nothing that we can do. And that was awful because I lost all of my files from like age 18 to 30. So it's like my life got like completely erased. And I thought it was me.

[00:19:36] And I thought like, oh, I must be bad at tech, even though I'm not bad at tech. And then when we got divorced, like right when I left, the same thing happened and all of my files got deleted and my external hard drive got deleted, like right after the separation happened. And it was in the exact same way. Like the computer looked the exact same. And I was like, oh my God, I think that my ex-husband is doing this.

[00:20:04] And so I went to a like tech security specialist and he had installed a remote access device in my computer. So he had all of my passwords. He had like, yeah, like everything. And those were two early red flags that I just blamed myself for instead of ever thinking that this could be. But why would you think that's the whole thing? It's such a malevolent like thing to do.

[00:20:33] Why would you think that he's incapable of that? Yeah. And I noticed. Crazy. It's crazy. And I noticed that like erasing people's identity and like is actually something that happens in like extreme religious situations. I used to be obsessed with watching escaping polygamy when I was getting out of my abusive marriage. It was very soothing for me to watch these other women leaving abusive marriages as well.

[00:20:59] A common feature was that like after they would leave, the family would burn all of their belongings and they would cut them out of photos and just kind of like completely delete them from their lives. I'm going to send you an episode we did with Amanda Rae Grant, who helped with escaping polygamy and also was in a like a very abusive polygamous sect called The Order. And if it, I mean, if it brings you, if it brings you peace. It brings me peace.

[00:21:29] Yeah. It brings me peace. Be careful, Sarah. Yes. I'm like, I think The Order is Warren Jeffs, right? The setting is shining. Wait, Warren Jeffs is FLDS. The Order is somebody else whose name I'm forgetting right now. Did you watch Trust Me about Sam Bateman on Netflix right now? I did. I watch all of them, Mormon. You watch all of them. Yeah. It's like my soothing shows. Yes, I feel you.

[00:21:55] So that episode just dropped this week with Christine Marie, the incredibly brave woman who went in to help those women. And crazy cross story is that she knew and briefly dated our cult leader. Oh, wow. Like 20, 20 something, 25 years ago or so. Anyway, it's a small little polygamist culty world. The cult world we run in. And is your cult leader still like active? No, he's in jail. Okay.

[00:22:23] If you love cult documentaries, we have some homework for you. I know. I'm really excited. I was like, this is going to expand my awareness of cult. I believe you're... Well, you'll see the pattern. You'll see how he targets. And when you see some of the women, it'll put language hopefully to your situation. I mean, we could do a whole other side episode with you after you've watched The Vow on HBO and you could analyze like... I mean, there's a whole... Like the women were sleep deprived.

[00:22:53] They were thin as fuck. They were not eating properly. They were on like 300 calorie diets. They were all like... Like they just... There's a whole somatics thing we could do analyzing that. He sucked their life force. He really did. Yeah. Yeah. But we're going to focus on your book and interweave some stories as we go. Okay. So I just realized that, you know, obviously like we personally have to laugh because that's where, you know, we're at in our journey. But like what happened to you is very serious.

[00:23:24] And also we did... We, you know, didn't really... We sort of touched on it to say that you... I want you to expand however you want or just to say that you did undergo sexual childhood abuse and also was assaulted when you were 14 and roofied, which I think... Well, to what extent do you feel like that's important for people to understand your journey? Letter here. Yeah. I think it's a foundational part of my journey.

[00:23:50] Like my baseline was completely disrupted at such a young age. My baseline for safety like was never there, especially within relationship with like the people that you're closest to. So the childhood sexual abuse occurred with someone in my extended family. So my parents would fly my brother and I out to Chicago every summer by ourselves without them so that they could like take a little break.

[00:24:20] And we stayed at my grandma and grandpa's house, but I have like a really big extended family on that side. And I slept out in the living room. And I don't have the best memories because I was only seven or eight when it started. But I do remember... I have some dissociative amnesia from that whole phase of my life because neurologically, that's something that can happen when you experience trauma like that.

[00:24:50] Like your brain can't process it. And then you kind of like can't remember it for a certain part of your life. Once I started feeling safer and started healing, I did get a lot of flashbacks and a lot of memories came back. But I do remember that... You know, I remember a lot of the sensations that I had while sleeping there. And I remember calling my mom the next day and like begging to come home and telling her

[00:25:15] that there were monsters in my bed and just crying and begging and telling her I didn't feel safe. Please let me come home. Please fly me home. And she was like, you're fine. You're fine. You know, because she thought... Like I didn't have the language for what was going on. And that continued every year that we went back until I was about like 12 or 13.

[00:25:39] And then I was on a family vacation in Mexico and I was only 14 years old at the time and I got left alone at the pool. And the lifeguard came up to me and was like, do you want a margarita? And I was like 14. I was like, yes. And, you know, he had roofied the margarita. And then I got sexually assaulted then. And that like while that sexual assault was happening, I remember having this thought,

[00:26:07] not this again. And so that was when a lot of my childhood stuff started resurfacing for me. And then as I did somatic healing, it like resurfaced even more. Well, first of all, I'm so sorry that you went through all that. And yeah, I think that say like how people suppress it and then it comes out later. So it's such an important thing to understand because I think that people don't like they

[00:26:34] don't have a concept of even how that happens, like why you wouldn't remember it or or maybe they start a healing journey and things start to pop up and then they maybe doubt that it happened or, you know, like there's so it's such a complex. It's also vague too, because you're dealing with memories. So it's a hard, it's a hard, like, did you go through, do you trust your memories? Like, did you ensure there was a whole, yeah, it's, it's a hard one. Yes. Well, also having the CPTSD diagnosis, I was like, am I just having like a trauma spiral right now?

[00:27:04] Am I, you know, like, is this real? And my therapist was like, you literally can't make up flashbacks. Like they're real. You can't like, they're real. They're real. They're real. So, yeah. Well, thank you for walking us through that. I know that's sort of like the template to, you know, maybe missing some of the red flags with your husband. Let's skip to how did you finally leave? Like what was the final straw and how did you get out?

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[00:29:31] So it was COVID. So I didn't really, like, as I was starting to realize that I was being abused, it was early COVID. And it was the time, and at least in California, you couldn't, like, go even to your, like, closest relative's house. It was deep lockdown. And so I was just, like, taking baths and trying to make my exit plan in the bath because that was the only time that he wasn't bothering me or, like, heavily monitoring me.

[00:30:01] And so that was, like, my little safe space. And so I was trying, like, you know, anytime I could to, like, set $5 aside, $10 aside. But I was really, like, digging into what had happened. So prior to COVID, I worked, like, six days a week because I was the breadwinner for us and I supported us financially. His full-time job was just, like, abusing me, apparently, even though he said he was, like,

[00:30:30] a quote-unquote musician. He made no money. And there was just a lot of financial abuse. And I kept trying to bring it up and be, like, why is our money gone? Why is our money gone? Like, I'm making so much more. I'm working so much more. Why is it gone all the time? And he would never, like, he got kind of physically aggressive with me when I would bring that up. So I got really scared to bring it up. And he also had done a lot of things, like, because he had access to all of my computer passwords

[00:31:00] and everything, he had, like, locked me out of our joint account sometimes. So he would, like, change the password and then change the two-factor to go to his phone. So when I would try to do, like, a password reset, I wasn't able to get in because I didn't get the two-factor. He was, like, intercepting my mail when I was gone all the time, like, working. He would intercept my mail and then, you know, like, essentially, like, just pay the minimums on my credit cards so that my credit score didn't tank.

[00:31:30] But, like, he was, he charged over $30,000 on my personal credit cards while we were married without my permission or my knowledge. So there was just, like, so much financial abuse going on that I started really digging into that during COVID because I lost, I was a Pilates instructor and I lost my job at the beginning of COVID because the gyms were closed in California and the studio that I worked for couldn't afford to keep us on.

[00:31:56] So I finally had all this time to, like, look into what was going on. And so I was, like, instead of doing a two-factor, I was, like, calling the credit card company or calling the bank to get access in. And then I was spending a lot of time on it. And when I started seeing the financial abuse on paper, I was, like, oh, my God. Like, this, like, he's stealing from me over and over again. And it was just really intense to see it all laid out like that, like, transfers of $5,000,

[00:32:24] $10,000 to these other accounts that were just in his name while he wasn't working. And I was, like, working so hard I had no energy to do anything else. So the financial abuse was, like, the thing that really made me realize I was being abused. And then I also realized, like, wow, I think I've been brainwashed in the course of my marriage. And that was really scary for me as well. How did you figure that out? Like, where did that thought even come from?

[00:32:53] Did you see something or read something? There's gaslighting going on. Yeah, sure. Yeah, I mean, I thought that, like, he made me trust him a lot because he also had a background with sexual assault as well. Like, he was sexually assaulted in his childhood. So we had, like, this common trauma. And we had trauma bonded over that. And he had always presented to me until, like, the end when he got, like, really physically aggressive.

[00:33:20] He had always presented, like, very understanding and very supportive of me. And so, and then, you know, he did things. He said little things, like, when all my tech got deleted and all my data got deleted from my computer. The first time when we were still together, he was like, oh, you mustn't be that good at tech. Like, and I was like, never had anything like this happen before, you know? But that story, like, because I trusted him so much.

[00:33:49] It was like, and he was my husband, you know? It was like, maybe I'm not that good at tech. Like, maybe that is what's going on. Maybe I need to, like, teach myself tech and get more financially savvy. But I just really started to doubt myself a lot. That's gaslighting. Yeah, that's like classic gaslighting to do the thing to you and then make it. Well, and plant it out. And then make you think that was your problem. That's it. Yeah.

[00:34:17] And this guy sounds, he's very good at what he does. Yes. Yes. He was raised Pentecostal, actually. And his dad was a Pentecostal preacher. Another red flag that I ignored was that he told me that his dad was a master manipulator. And I was like, that's terrifying. And he was like, don't worry, I'm not like that. And then, you know, now I know he is exactly the same.

[00:34:46] And have you met his dad? I met his dad. I didn't, I had met. Do you think he's a master manipulator? Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. I think you have to be if you're a Pentecostal priest. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. No, I do too. I'll die in that hill. Yeah, I do too. Yeah, I didn't really get to know his dad. We actually lost our apartment during COVID because of the financial abuse and because I wasn't working and continuously bringing in all this money. And so we had to go live with his parents.

[00:35:15] And then that was another thing for me where I was like, whoa, he is exactly like his dad. And I could see how manipulative his dad was really easily because I didn't have that trust with his dad. You said that in your book. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Okay. So much to cover here. Let's try to condense it so we can get into, you know, what you've learned. But I guess, okay. Everyone loves- We didn't say it led you here. It led you here. But everyone loves a good escape story. How did you actually like- Yeah. How'd you get out?

[00:35:46] Here's your guitar solo. Yeah. So there was an incident that happened where like I was cleaning the garbage disposal and he turned the garbage disposal on while I was cleaning it. And I like looked at his face and his eyes were black. And like, like I could, like he had like this little smirk and I was like, and I luckily pulled my hands out really fast. And I just was like, hey, this was like later in COVID and we could go out again.

[00:36:15] I was like, hey, you should go to that music studio that you go to. And I was like really calm about it because I had learned this technique from Dr. Romani called narcissistic fluffing, which helps you when you're about to escape. So you're like, it's like, it's not, obviously I'm not advocating doing this long-term. It's really helpful when you're leaving to like appease the narcissist. And so that they don't think anything's coming. Right. So I was just like really calm.

[00:36:44] I was like, hey, you should go to the music studio. Like have a great day. I'm going to just keep cleaning the apartment. And he left and I just decided like, this is the moment. I don't have as much money as I wanted to have for my escape plan. But like, this is the scariest moment that I've had with him so far. Like I could have destroyed my hand and I got to go.

[00:37:08] So I called him and I was like, hey, you can't come back to the apartment. Like I'm terrified of you. And I know that you've been transferring large sums of money out of our account. And I have it all on paper. And like, you can't come back. And he was like, like, you can't do that to me. We're married. I'm coming back. And I had already filed a police report on him and was in the process of getting a restraining order.

[00:37:38] And so I went to my apartment building and asked them if they would change the locks. And they did. And so he couldn't come back. And I didn't feel safe in the apartment. So I actually slept in my car for a few nights with my dog because I was just really scared. But then essentially, I just like didn't let him come back to the apartment. There was a day that I said, like, you can come get your stuff.

[00:38:02] But I like moved everything out for him and also wasn't at the apartment during that time. And my mom came up and kind of helped me right after that. But I realized I couldn't stay in that apartment long term. I was terrified. I like had like knives out. And I was just like in such a bad state. You were hypervigilance. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yeah, he just, he like vandalized my car in the apartment garage because he still

[00:38:30] had access to the fob for the building garage. So I'm pretty sure he's the one that vandalized it. I don't know who else would have done it. Probably a very high chance. That was. The pattern would make sense. Yeah. Okay. And that was it. Were you able to like extract yourself pretty clearly? I mean, no. So like, right. So that weekend, that was when the second data, like all my data got deleted from my computer

[00:38:58] that weekend that I kicked him out of the apartment. And, you know, there was just a lot of like, I was trying to get access to some of my own internet. Like I had already started the workout, which.com at that time and stuff. And I was like trying to get my domain back from him and he like wouldn't give it back to me. And there was just any way that he could try to control me. He did.

[00:39:24] But luckily my parents got me like a tech security person to help me look into everything that happened. And I got like all new devices. I was, I did a lot of things to protect myself. I spent like a month kind of like undoing the tech abuse aspect. And it was like a full-time job for me for a month. And I was living in a hotel for a minute. I was living in my car for a minute. Like it wasn't smooth at all.

[00:39:52] And spending time with my parents right after that, I realized like, oh, all of this childhood stuff came back up where I was like, oh, they have a really similar dynamic to what I experienced just like at a much lesser scale. So I had to like call my brother and ask my brother to come down and help me. And I ended up staying with my aunt and my uncle. And it was just like, I was homeless for four months or so. That's so destabilizing. Yeah.

[00:40:21] On top of everything else. And meanwhile, you've established yourself as a workout witch on TikTok and you're doing this. How did you get into somatics? Like where did that? And why workout witch? I lovingly joke that I am a witch, but really I'm just good at healing. Yes. I'm just good at healing people's bodies in a very non-conventional way. And the workout witch is just like such a fun name. It's so much better than Liz Tenuto somatics. But what was the first question that you asked?

[00:40:51] Oh, yeah. How did you get into somatics? Oh, so I was a professional dancer and my ballet teacher noticed how dissociated I was when I was not dancing when I was like 22. And I knew I had PTSD from the sexual assault at the time. And I was like, yeah, I have PTSD. And she was like, you should try my somatics class. And I was really skeptical because I had seen her somatics class before our ballet class. And it was just a bunch of people rolling around on the floor in their pajamas.

[00:41:20] And I was like, I don't know how this is going to help me with dissociation. I also had like really bad sleep issues, you know, which connects to my trauma. Like I didn't sleep after a lot of that happened to me for like 10 years. So I was like, I don't get how this is going to help me with like sleep issues and dissociation. But I cried in the bathroom after my first session because my body felt so, so good.

[00:41:47] And then after four sessions, my insomnia was like almost gone and nothing else had worked for me that well. Like I had tried doctors, specialists, alternative stuff like yoga, meditation, acupuncture. I would try anything in my early 20s. I was like a wellness junkie in my early 20s. And that was the first thing that like really worked for me.

[00:42:12] And then when I started looking into it, I was like, oh, this is like an incredible way for me to blend my background with movement and dance and Pilates and my obsession with that, with my obsession with healing. Okay, perfect. So when we come back for part two on Thursday, we are going to hear all about what Liz, the workout witch, has learned, what the book is about, and what we'll get more into what somatics are, how to put them in your life.

[00:42:39] And if there's time at the end, Liz has also offered to diagnose unofficially Nippy and I and some of our body challenges and maybe give us some exercises specifically for us, which I think would also relate to so many of our listenership who are on a similar journey. So come back next time for part two with the workout witch.

[00:43:42] And see you next time. A Little Bit Culty is a Trace 120 production. Executive produced by Sarah Edmondson and Anthony Nippy Ames in collaboration with producer Will Rutherford at Citizens of Sound. Our co-creator is Jess Temple Tardy. Our production coordinator is Leslie Dinsenbor. Writing by Sandra Nomoto and social media marketing by Eric Swarczynski and Brooke Keane. Our theme song Cultivated is by the artists John Bryant and Nigel Aslan.